I’m Not Good Enough

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Jeremiah 31:3 (NKJV) The Lord has appeared of old to me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.

 

When I’ve thought that or heard someone say that, the first reaction is to reassure, “Yes, you are good enough”.  But you know what, I’m not and you’re not…good enough.  Our whole lives we strive to be good, even great, maybe even the best, but then we fail or someone is better than us, or most likely we just get exhausted in keeping up that “Good Enough” position.  After many years of seeking my Heavenly Father I really realized that the whole point is I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH!  That is the point!  As my Father’s Daughter He loves me and makes every provision for me, but as long as I think I’m good enough, smart enough, witty enough, pretty enough… I can’t truly and fully be everything He’s designed me to be because in that area I’m my focus, I’m the strength and it’s my capabilities I lean on.  Has He gifted me and given me strengths and talents?   YES!  Did He intend for me to use those talents?  YES!  But He did not intend that I take pride in those talents, or run off and use them how I think they should be used for His glory.  Every good and perfect gift comes from Him and with that He wants us to be so focused on Jesus that every strength, talent and mistake and weakness, everything, we do is out of relationship with Him.  Once I truly begin to understand that, I’m correct, I’m not good enough, I’ll never be good enough but EVERYTHING that I need to be, who He created me to be, designed me to be is in and out of my relationship with Him.  All the pressure and worry of others expectations, as well as my own, begin to melt away and I can trust and lean on and rely on Him to bring about this work.  He didn’t expect me to be able to do it, nor does He expect that of me.  He expects me to know Him, trust Him and be obedient.

Just like Moses in Exodus Chapter 4 when God directed him to go to the leaders of the Israelites and subsequently Pharaoh.  Moses outlined every reason he was not the right person for the job, but God knew he was because this is what he had created him for.  It wasn’t in Moses’ talents or capabilities, although those were definitely there, Moses had been raised in Pharoah’s palace to be a leader and spent 40 years in the desert learning godly humility.  It was in Moses’ ability to let God work through Him and let Him perform some of the most amazing miracles in the Bible.  Despite what appears to be Moses’ lack of confidence, we see him time and again do what God asks him to do, say what God asks him to say and believe that God is going to be enough.  (Note:  when you have a few minutes I’d suggest reading this story with the view of how we can truly surrender and see what God can do through us when we do, even when we think we’re not the right person for the job!)

Now maybe your challenge is not that you lean too much on your own abilities and talents, maybe when you say that you’re not good enough it’s because you feel you’ve failed at every turn.   You’ve been told and believe that you’re not good enough, that there isn’t anything you are capable of succeeding at.  You don’t think God would want you, would ever think of using you and if He did, He’d be sorry that He wasted His time because you would make a huge mess of it and prove, again, that you are worthless.  I must admit that is not a familiar place for me but I know that there are many women out there that struggle with their value and have so much experience with failing that they just can’t imagine accomplishing something good.  Honestly, this is the flip side of the same coin.  If Satan can’t trap you into leaning on yourself to live your life, he will trap you in a sense of failure so deep that you won’t trust anyone, even God, to see you and expect you to succeed.  Both of these positions are bad.  A person totally confident in their abilities is just as lost as a person with absolutely no hope or confidence.  We both need to put our hope in Jesus, it’s not what WE can do it’s what HE has done!

Our successes and our failures are wiped out completely by who we are in Him!  It’s who we are in Christ and finding ourselves in Him that pleases Him.  So whatever side of the coin you are on, it’s time to give up and put your hope in Him.  I am not good enough, you are not good enough but good news!  He doesn’t expect us to be, and our loving Abba sent Jesus because we weren’t meant to be, only Jesus is good enough and if you’ve accepted Him, you are in Him and you have everything you need to be good enough in Him!

A Daughter’s Prayer – Abba, You have given me the mind of your precious son Jesus.  Jesus knows fully how very much You love Him.  Jesus also knows that every aspect of today is taken care of and every aspect of each day is taken care of.  Because of the confidence of that knowledge, Jesus is able to sit at Your right hand until His enemies are made His footstool.  Because of His confidence in Your great love for Him, He has no personal concerns, but He is wholly and completely about Your business.  He gives, nor takes thought for tomorrow.  Instead He knows You are directing His path to best accomplish His/Your good works.

I have been blessed with that same mind and it is for me to choose to have it set on You and the things above, or to be distracted and then focused on the work of the devil who is trying to press me down.  But Enough!  No more time wasted in not trusting, not relying wholly on You.  No more being worried, anxious and confused.  You have fully provisioned me and I will open those provisions, I will be positive and lay down my human reasoning for godly wisdom and discernment.  I will walk uprightly and keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.  My hope is in You, what You have done and what is being revealed.  Great is Your faithfulness.  Open wide the doors of my heart as I lay down myself and instead become committed to being an open vessel for You.  In Jesus holy name, so be it!

 

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