Archive | September 2014

I’m Not Good Enough

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Jeremiah 31:3 (NKJV) The Lord has appeared of old to me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.

 

When I’ve thought that or heard someone say that, the first reaction is to reassure, “Yes, you are good enough”.  But you know what, I’m not and you’re not…good enough.  Our whole lives we strive to be good, even great, maybe even the best, but then we fail or someone is better than us, or most likely we just get exhausted in keeping up that “Good Enough” position.  After many years of seeking my Heavenly Father I really realized that the whole point is I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH!  That is the point!  As my Father’s Daughter He loves me and makes every provision for me, but as long as I think I’m good enough, smart enough, witty enough, pretty enough… I can’t truly and fully be everything He’s designed me to be because in that area I’m my focus, I’m the strength and it’s my capabilities I lean on.  Has He gifted me and given me strengths and talents?   YES!  Did He intend for me to use those talents?  YES!  But He did not intend that I take pride in those talents, or run off and use them how I think they should be used for His glory.  Every good and perfect gift comes from Him and with that He wants us to be so focused on Jesus that every strength, talent and mistake and weakness, everything, we do is out of relationship with Him.  Once I truly begin to understand that, I’m correct, I’m not good enough, I’ll never be good enough but EVERYTHING that I need to be, who He created me to be, designed me to be is in and out of my relationship with Him.  All the pressure and worry of others expectations, as well as my own, begin to melt away and I can trust and lean on and rely on Him to bring about this work.  He didn’t expect me to be able to do it, nor does He expect that of me.  He expects me to know Him, trust Him and be obedient.

Just like Moses in Exodus Chapter 4 when God directed him to go to the leaders of the Israelites and subsequently Pharaoh.  Moses outlined every reason he was not the right person for the job, but God knew he was because this is what he had created him for.  It wasn’t in Moses’ talents or capabilities, although those were definitely there, Moses had been raised in Pharoah’s palace to be a leader and spent 40 years in the desert learning godly humility.  It was in Moses’ ability to let God work through Him and let Him perform some of the most amazing miracles in the Bible.  Despite what appears to be Moses’ lack of confidence, we see him time and again do what God asks him to do, say what God asks him to say and believe that God is going to be enough.  (Note:  when you have a few minutes I’d suggest reading this story with the view of how we can truly surrender and see what God can do through us when we do, even when we think we’re not the right person for the job!)

Now maybe your challenge is not that you lean too much on your own abilities and talents, maybe when you say that you’re not good enough it’s because you feel you’ve failed at every turn.   You’ve been told and believe that you’re not good enough, that there isn’t anything you are capable of succeeding at.  You don’t think God would want you, would ever think of using you and if He did, He’d be sorry that He wasted His time because you would make a huge mess of it and prove, again, that you are worthless.  I must admit that is not a familiar place for me but I know that there are many women out there that struggle with their value and have so much experience with failing that they just can’t imagine accomplishing something good.  Honestly, this is the flip side of the same coin.  If Satan can’t trap you into leaning on yourself to live your life, he will trap you in a sense of failure so deep that you won’t trust anyone, even God, to see you and expect you to succeed.  Both of these positions are bad.  A person totally confident in their abilities is just as lost as a person with absolutely no hope or confidence.  We both need to put our hope in Jesus, it’s not what WE can do it’s what HE has done!

Our successes and our failures are wiped out completely by who we are in Him!  It’s who we are in Christ and finding ourselves in Him that pleases Him.  So whatever side of the coin you are on, it’s time to give up and put your hope in Him.  I am not good enough, you are not good enough but good news!  He doesn’t expect us to be, and our loving Abba sent Jesus because we weren’t meant to be, only Jesus is good enough and if you’ve accepted Him, you are in Him and you have everything you need to be good enough in Him!

A Daughter’s Prayer – Abba, You have given me the mind of your precious son Jesus.  Jesus knows fully how very much You love Him.  Jesus also knows that every aspect of today is taken care of and every aspect of each day is taken care of.  Because of the confidence of that knowledge, Jesus is able to sit at Your right hand until His enemies are made His footstool.  Because of His confidence in Your great love for Him, He has no personal concerns, but He is wholly and completely about Your business.  He gives, nor takes thought for tomorrow.  Instead He knows You are directing His path to best accomplish His/Your good works.

I have been blessed with that same mind and it is for me to choose to have it set on You and the things above, or to be distracted and then focused on the work of the devil who is trying to press me down.  But Enough!  No more time wasted in not trusting, not relying wholly on You.  No more being worried, anxious and confused.  You have fully provisioned me and I will open those provisions, I will be positive and lay down my human reasoning for godly wisdom and discernment.  I will walk uprightly and keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.  My hope is in You, what You have done and what is being revealed.  Great is Your faithfulness.  Open wide the doors of my heart as I lay down myself and instead become committed to being an open vessel for You.  In Jesus holy name, so be it!

 

And the Journey Began…

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Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV) – For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

“…and if you don’t understand how much God loves you, you probably shouldn’t go too much further…”

Words to that effect were what I heard a few years ago when my sister was visiting and we were watching a Joyce Meyer teaching on TV.  She and I looked and each other and I remember saying that I wasn’t sure I really did know that and she had a similar response.  How was that possible?  I’d been a Christian almost all my life, read lots of the Bible, prayed, attended thousands of church services and even gone to hear amazing men and women of God speak.  When Joyce said that, how come that raised a question in me?  I don’t know that I have the answer to that question, but I do know that that is where my journey to discover how my Heavenly Father, whom I call Abba* sees me really began.  That said, it hasn’t been a, I’ve decided and now I get it process…by any means!  Instead, not only have I been looking at the Bible in a completely new light, but I’m learning that to really GET IT, I have to BELIEVE IT!  And maybe that’s the answer to my earlier question, I had read it, memorized it, but I wasn’t living like I believed it because I was still anxious, troubled and lost in many areas of my life.

When you ask yourself the questions, “How real is my understanding of the love my Heavenly Father has for me?  How does my life represent a confidence in that love?  If I truly understood and believed in what the Bible says about His care for me what would be different about the way I’m living my life?” what is your response to that?  Are you like me and have a realization that there’s a lot more joy, peace, love and comfort that would/could be yours if you really saw yourself the way your Heavenly Father sees you?  There’s a lot more confidence in who you are in Christ available to you because of what He’s done to have you as His daughter?  If so, that is the journey we are on.  I truly believe that as we discover Him and His love for us, we will also discover the daughter He created you and me to be and we will begin walking the path He designed for us based upon the thoughts our Heavenly Father has for you and for me, just as Jeremiah 29:11 promises!

*Note:  I started using the term Abba a while ago to create a closer communication connection when I’m praying with my Heavenly Father (the term Heavenly Father just seemed kind of distant to me).  Abba is an Aramaic word (the language of the Jews in Jesus’ time) for father, used by Jesus and Paul to address God in a relation of personal intimacy.   That is what I wanted to create, personal intimacy between myself and my Heavenly Father, so you will see me use the term Abba a lot, and you are welcome to too!!

A Daughter’s Prayer

Abba, we do not need to put our efforts into trying to figure out what our future is or our purpose.  You know what it is, You have it planned and mapped out for us.  My hope is in You.  As I continue to fix my eyes on Jesus, my hope in Him, my future will become my present and I will see Your glory for me, in me, and through me.  Great is Your faithfulness.

I open my mind (of Christ), my heart and my arms to receive You and all that You are are, which creates in me all I am in You and who I need to be.  I am Your workmanship, created in Christ for good works.

Thank You for this day, thank you for Your provisions, thank you for my family and I expect great and amazing things for our whole household!  In Jesus’ holy name.  Amen!

Welcome to the Journey!

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Our Heavenly Father Loves His Daughters!

It’s quite a journey, trying to understand how our heavenly Father sees us, His daughters.  Despite the words in the Bible, life and circumstances can distort our view of Him and how we believe He sees us.  While recent life events have certainly intensified my desire to really understand how He truly sees me and be able to believe what His Word says about me, I looked back to a journal entry I made almost exactly a year ago.  It’s interesting to read what you wrote months ago and even more interesting to see the challenges you’ve gone through that actually put you in a position to better understand what was at that point in time, really a hope not a revelation.  I felt a strong desire to share this journey with other women who are curious, struggling or are discovering themselves what it means to be the daughter of the Creator.  My hope and prayer is that it will begin speaking to you the way it is now speaking to me as I continue on my quest of having implicit confidence in my heavenly Father to take amazing care of me, my family, my friends and those He brings across my path.   Welcome!  And I can’t wait to see where this journey brings us to as individuals and as a collective…I’m My Father’s Daughter and together We are our Father’s Daughters!

Be God Loves Me Minded – God loves me.  My heavenly Father absolutely and truly loves me.  My God has only thoughts of good towards me.  My God is for me, so who can be against me?  My God created a way for me to be with Him always, to ensure I was in a position to receive all He has in mind for me.  Jesus gave His life, laid down His position in heaven, came to earth, conquered death, hell and the grave, so that I could retain my right standing with my Father.  While I was yet a sinner, Christ died for ME.
A Daughter’s Prayer – Holy Spirit I humbly ask that you would open the eyes of my spirit, reveal to me how much I am loved by my Father.  Help me truly experience His vast and amazing love.  Bask in the light of His presence.  Help me truly understand His perfect love and that perfect love casts out all fear.
I am nothing without Him, but in Christ I am everything I am supposed to be.  May the knowledge of this truth truly set me free.  May my Father’s goodness overcome the evil that has tried to rule my mind and emotions.
I am my Father’s daughter.  I am highly favored.  Everything my Father gave Jesus is mine.  I am lavished with every good and perfect gift.  There is nothing too difficult for my Father.  He is working out a marvelous plan for my life that is super abundantly, far above anything I could ask, hope or think.
I am my Father’s daughter and nothing can harm me and nothing can pluck me from His hand.  I am fully His and He is completely mine.
In Jesus’s holy name.  Amen.